Emotional Control vs. Emotional Regulation: What's The Difference?

One of the biggest paradigm shifts I’ve had in the last 5 years, is there’s a difference between emotional control & emotional regulation.

I was an athlete.

So emotional control was effortless.

I read the books.

I meditated.

I knew how to put stress in a mental “filing cabinet”… when the game was on the line… and then sting a game winning shot.

There was virtually nothing that could “shake me” emotionally.

Or so I thought…

Thing is, whatever emotions you have.

I believe you have to process them.

You have to create space to sit with them.

Or do the deep work, and possibly work with a therapist to “flush them out”

Meditation, detached me from emotions.

Got me present. In the zone.

And so did all the other sport psych tools I used.

Go away emotions, lemme ‘lock you in this emotional closet for a second’…

I got something else to focus on rn, and can’t have you knocking me off my game.

Sure, you can revisit the thought or feeling later.

But flushing it out and/or regulating it, is a whole different level of self mastery…

One, which I NEVER thought was important…

Until I read the book “Market Mind Games” by Denise Schultz…

AND I watched HBO showtimes’ Billions…

And one day the protagonist, Bobby Axelrod (Axe) and his CIO, Taylor were talking…

Taylor was about using Logic and No Emotion in trading…

Axe, however, used Emotion AND Logic.

He said that last piece is what separates the best.

The more I dig into this…

The more I realize in performance:

Emotions, when aimed at the right target are freaking lethal.

That’s why there’s so much talk about having a ‘why’ and a vision and all that…

…and really, the most important thing in self mastery is knowing when to use emotion and when not to—to get the best outcome.

But in order to know WHEN…

You must have both emotional control AND emotional regulation skills.

When you have both, you master emotions at a level very few have.

When you master emotions, you know when to use them and when not to.

And like Axe said, that’s what separates the best.

Just something I’ve learned in my own self development.

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